A week later than the usual, but I promise I’ve got a good reason for it.
Real life caught up with me and here lies a huge cliché of starting new chapters. I have indeed been writing you chapters and stories about our life and about how did we get where we did, but funny enough, this past week brought us a changing and turning point. Although already in repetition, it was fairly unexpected. It led us to misbelief and, although a ‘better judgement’ was questioned, we are still living in limbo upon these facts.
Here is the thing: no matter how much someone writes or tells you what they think and feel; you will never be able to fully grasp what truly goes on in their minds. Well, at least this is the feeling we are left with. Whatever you believed and bet your life in, vanishes in just a second, simply for one’s satisfaction and desire. It sounds sad and strange, but I guess the best thing I can say about it is that it is cruel.
Believing someone is one of the greatest gifts one can give. Evolution has brought us so much doubt about the world and an excessive amount of options in life which, of course, leads us to question what comes next and take an abnormal amount of time to make choices. Also, it gets us thinking about the future, love and prosperity. So many choices, so little known. And then, someone comes and gives you a heart to take care of. In return, you give yours. And you believe it will be safe there.
Time is the most powerful force in the universe, they say. It fixes things, healing and bringing it all to the right order, the one which should be in place. Time gets you to figure out how much you feel that you want to be together and how important are the people in your life. Time can be life changing and show that not only good things come from it, but also some truths of life.
And that is how our past week has been: all about time. We had to take time to pack, to think, to prepare. We tried to figure out how life was going to be, attempting to foresee the future and the people in it. So many different thoughts had overtaken my head for so long that it got hard to think of eliminating a pivot from it. And as time brought him in, only time will take him out.
As we, once again, remove ourselves from that life, we wonder what will be of the trust we once carried with us. So many times it has already been broken that our heart worries that this time has been beyond repair. Yes, I know we have talked about that already, but still… how can you believe someone again? Does love really vanishes overnight? How can words be said with such precision and, yet, be completely dismissed by the break of dawn? This time, no answers, my friend.
And so it’s time for us to begin a new chapter. In real life, in daily practice. We are faced with a completely different life than we expected to have right now and we need to adapt to it. So, yeah… time! There is a pool filled with sadness in our heart, but we are still believing that all of this is for the best. I guess it is the only hope that keeps us going, the only feeling we have left. Time will be our best friend from now on.
So, for now, we crawl tight under the blankets, we let the pillow dry our tears, we open our chest to the feelings to come and stay. We trust that if they see our pain, they soon will go. I know her heart will never be the same again, but I am here for her and I will try to protect her better this time, to see and examine the signs.
And may love, trust and tenderness one day, finally, truly come to stay.
